Gambling Cheat Sheet: MLB, 4-9

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Terry Collins

Folks, it’s time we had a little heart to heart. A little Ted Talk if you will, but since it’s about gambling, and obvious copyright issues I think we legally need to call it Terry Talk? Honestly I don’t really know what Ted Talk is aside from an outdated thing people reference on Twitter. Nor do I fully grasp the whole copyright thing when it comes to names…I mean I’m a degenerate gambler from the middle of a cornfield in Illinois, so give me a break on this shit, jeez. Plus, this is a place where as fellow sick gamblers we can have discussions free of judgment… Unless it’s me judging you, because that will without a doubt happen, because some of you are probably ripe for judgment…but I digress. Let’s get back to the heart of this thing: my gambling cheat sheet.

Let’s start this thing over.

Terry Talk

Welcome to my Terry Talk. In this installment I’m going to put myself out there and talk about something painful. You ready? Okay let’s dive in. As hard as this is to admit, I feel obligated to say it… we go….I have been extremely inconsistent gambling, and I don’t know why I’ve been so up and down…..phew, getting that off my chest feels like the weight of 3 John Deere tractors being lifted off me. And when I say tractors I mean the old school 40 series John Deere workhorses, not the plastic covered trash they make today.

I’ve had days where I’ve cleaned up, and made a killing. I’ve had days where I’ve been slaughtered like a sacrificial lamb being used as a gift to the gambling Gods. So the question is simple, how do I get back to being consistent? Well frankly, I have no fucking clue, so if any of you got some ideas toss them bad boys my way.

Until I solve this problem, I’m going to just keep plugging away. Like a factory worker lacing up his boots, putting his hard hat on, and punching in at the time clock. Or like a fisherman casting out a line in a water, just hoping that big ol’ flat head grabs on to the hook…..side note, a good bait for catfish is some day old warm chicken breast, covered in purple Kool Aid dry mix…don’t ask me why purple is the best, it just is damn it. Back to my original point, I’m going to keep fighting to get back to consistently winning, and stop being up and down.

When I win, we all win

Now before all of you anoint me some great leader, or tireless man doing all of this for you, hold your horses there bubba. Is this noble act good for all of you readers? Sure. But let’s get one thing crystal clear. I’m doing this for me first and foremost. I want to win money every day. I won’t settle for less. In the words on the great philosopher Marshall Mathers the third, “I did it for me, admittedly, I probably did it subliminally for you, so I could come back a brand new me, you helped see me through.” Ahh, wiser words never spoken. So therefore in a way, I am doing this for you all. No need to make a big deal and thank me for it though. I’m just a regular guy. Nothing special, just working my knuckles to the bones for all of you. You’re welcome.

So now that all of that is out of the way, should we get to the picks for today?

Favorite Bets:

*Phillies +107 vs Atlanta

Yes, the ban on betting on the Braves is still in place after costing me a +900 parlay, but that’s not why I like the Phillies here. Zach Wheeler absolutely dominated the Braves lineup less than a week ago racking up 10 strikeouts, and only allowing 1 hit through 7 innings. Do I think he replicates that gem? No. But I do think he has another great game here. Charlie Morton is taking the mound for Atlanta, and I think he gets touched up by the heart of the Philadelphia lineup. Take the Phillies.

*Padres -195 vs. Texas

Ever heard of K.I.S.S? Keep It Simple Stupid. We have a pitching matchup between Arihara, who is possibly the worst starter for any team today, just having given up 3 runs to the Royals without getting a strikeout. Verse Joe Musgrove who is coming off 6 scoreless innings and only allowing 3 hits to Arizona. Arihara thrives on creating contact, and relying on defense to make plays. Good luck allowing S.D. contact and somehow also not allowing runs.

*Tigers VS Indians Under 8.5 (-104)

I really think this is going to be a great pitching performance for both teams. I know Plesac vs. Teheran isn’t the flashiest of names, but both guys have the stuff needed to slow down an offense. I’m also bullish on the Detroit bats. For the over to hit I think Cleveland needs to put up 6 runs, and I don’t see that happening in this matchup.


*Yankees -1.5

*Rockies +132

Gambling Cheat Sheet Wrap-Up:

Can we all take a second to appreciate what just happened? This might have been the most impressive gambling cheat sheet ever written. I somehow managed to make references to John Deere, Ted Talk, Eminem, Catfish, and factory workers all in a gambling blog. Let that soak in for a second. Can a blogging performance ever top this? I’m not sure, but for the moment go ahead and give me the MVB (Most Valuable Blogger) award. I pity all others who try to top this. Good luck betting folks!

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Episode 59